If men are from Mars and women are from Venus, what planet is their relationship on?

John Gray's bestselling book used a planetary analogy to understand relationships. It proved very popular as a way of understanding and interpreting the behaviour patterns that men and women display.

Astrology also uses planets to understand and predict character traits and behaviour patterns. It is an extremely effective tool for analysing relationships. Venus and Mars are not the only planets looked at, although they are important. In total there are ten planets to consider and 12 different signs that each planet could be in. This gives a very high number of possible combinations, which can lead to an insightful and detailed analsis.

One of the reasons astrology is such a useful tool is its neutrality. By describing a relationship astrologically, a distance can be achieved. Difficulties then become a shared problem which could be resolved through co-operation. Identifying the problem as 'We have a Mars opposition' is a much more neutral way of saying 'We argue all the time' or even ' Why do you always argue with me?' What's more, astrology can even help to identify the timing of both good and difficult times. Knowing that things will get better can dissolve a lot of tension.

In any relationship there will be combinations of harmonious and challenging aspects, but there will often be a way of relating to each other that seems to work most of the time. It becomes a habitual way of interacting, the line of least resistance. Sometimes one particular planet provides a dominant theme for the relationship. In effect, it is the planet on which the relationship is based.

It could be the moon, signifying that emotional rapport and domestic compatability are the foundation on which it is based. Or it could be Mercury,indicating that both partners are on the same wavelength, can communicate well with each other and enjoy chatting or even writing to each other. Or perhaps it is the Sun, suggesting compatability at a deep level and that fundamental values and ways of approaching life are in harmony.

Only three examples have been given here, but there are lots more. It can get very complex, but the fundamental principles are simple and can be grasped by anybody sufficiently motivated to understand them.

If you want to understand the dynamic of a relationship, you should first try to understand each person as an individual. Astrology is a great way of doing this. It can help identify what matters most to you. If you are fundamentally an emotional person, emotional rapport will be the most important aspect of any relationship you have. A relationship that is great in lots of other ways, but does not meet this need, will ultimately be unfulfilling. Equally, you may tolerate all kinds of other difficulties if you are in a relationship where you feel a deep emotional connection. Discovering which planet you want the relationship to be on, is crucial. A great relationship on Venus may be fine for some people,but you might personally be happier with one based on the moon.

Astrology is a fascinating subject. After all, what could be more interesting than studying yourself, the person you love and the relationship that you have? It's worth investing some time to understand it yourself, rather than relying on other people's predictions and interpretations. It can be easy to place too much faith in an expert interpretation. There are some very experienced astrologers out there, but you are the most qualified person to understand yourself and your relationship. Astrology gives you the tools to do so in a neutral way, and it's also great fun. So, if you do feel inspired to look at it in more depth, be sure to enjoy yourself whatever planet you are on.

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